A doula is a non-medical support person, there solely for the mother and birth partner in the lead up to birth, during the labour & birth and postnatally.

Firstly, don’t fear change. It is what it is. Don’t feel that you need to jump into action the minute you hear of any alterations to your birth hopes. Just take the information and sit with it for a while.

Well, is that actually a problem? In short the answer to that is no. Your birth space can still be very much as you would like it to be.

It was a seismic shift in family roles. The pecking order reassembled.⠀And my heart just grew and grew to accommodate them all.⠀

Move as you wish. Stand, sit or lie as you wish. Focus on your wants, your baby, your body. ⠀Listen, listen, listen to yourself.

It’s okay to feel clumsy and clueless. To pore over parenting books and blogs. ⠀To ache when your baby cries, and cry when your baby aches.

Imagine if you were making love...and every time you were close to orgasm your partner stopped. Or talked. Or the phone rang.

Now, many women do not realise they have postnatal depression, because it can develop gradually. Inch by inch, it is as though your own mind is slowly gas-lighting you to believe that you are not worthy, not safe and not a good mother.

There has become a lack of familiarity with blood in birth. We see it as worrisome, concerning, wrong. But why?How have we become so disconnected?

You need to be able to notice when publications or practitioners talk about ‘coping’ as opposed to ‘thriving’. How language matters but actual facts do too.

Birth is earthy.⠀It is life-changing.⠀It is strength. Beginnings. Ripe fruit.⠀In birth lies sex. And power… but maternal power. Female led power.

No women should be made to feel that touching her own body, her own unborn baby is wrong in any way.

It isn't.

Mammals move in labour.⠀Mammals also make sounds in labour.⠀This is normal.⠀ ⠀

Birth in a safe space. Trusted. Revered. Supported in the knowledge of their inherited capabilities.

Imagine that you are lowering yourself into a free flowing river. You know where it will take you eventually but you are not yet privy to the twists and turns, the snags and eddies that this journey contains.

The first is your head.
The second is your body.
The third is your surroundings.
They all feed each other. ⠀

For nearly all women in the UK, USA and Australia who go past a certain date without having had their baby the induction question will come up. And this is an adulting decision that you do not wish to pass on to someone else.

… and really, that is alright.

I have assisted many dads-to-be who have passed out or been sick in the past when having a blood test or seeing someone else have a blood test. If this is you, please do not attempt to wing-it for your birthing partner!

During this triage your midwife may ask if you would like to have an internal, vaginal examination to check how dilated you currently are…

…and here we sometimes hit a problem.